11 April 2016

Upgrade Engine Coming Soon

Last photo taken at drop off
Three and an half months ago, I dropped off the car at DMC-California.  Long story short, I need an engine replacement.  This is just an update, in case you have been wondering, "why no new DeLorean posts?"

The was dropped off in late December.  I was told they would be backed up until about February.  No big deal, as I am in no rush.  Better to take the time to work out the kinks, anyway.  Also, there may be others that have more urgent issues with their cars and I might get bumped.

So, here is the update.  They have taken out the old engine and are waiting for parts to arrive from DMC-Texas.  The folks at DMC-California will be installing a Stage II system.  This will give me a little more power than stock set up.

The car should be ready by early May.  Stay tuned.

08 April 2016

State Farm's "Never" Commercial - What Happens Next

This State Farm commercial has been on the air for a few months.  Go ahead, spend thirty seconds and watch it.  But, watch it until the end.

In case the commercial is taken down I will describe the spot, breaking it up scene by scene.  You can skip this part if you have seen it.

- Guy is hanging with his bros and states (see what I did there) that he is "never getting married".
- We see the guy purchasing an engagement ring.
- Guy is with wife, sitting in a plane, in front of a rowdy kid and states, "we are never having kids"
- Wife is in delivery room.
- Guy and family are in their big city luxury apartment and states, "we are never moving to the suburbs".
- They are in the suburbs, as a minivan drives by, the guy states, "we are never getting one of those"
- Guy is washing his minivan.
- Guy is cleaning up crayon marks on the wall of their suburban house.  As his wife passes by, he states, "we are never having another kid".  She responds with, "I'm pregnant".
- Guy is cuddling with his wife and two kids and states, "I'm never letting go".
- "For all the nevers in life, State Farm is there."

So, this commercial has been bothering me for months, as longs as it has been on air.  Why, you ask.

This is a good advertisement with one flaw.  The good, obviously, is, like a good neighbour, State Farm is there if/when things change in your life and adjustments need to be made to your insurance policy.  At least that is what I think happens based on their ad campaigns.

But, I want to see the next scene.  "I will never *blank*", then said *blank* happens.  Well..."I'm never letting go".  Much like how Rose said she was not letting go in Titanic...only to immediately let go of Jack then watch him sink to the depths of the Atlantic...I expect the guy to let go.  Yes, like a divorce or something.  The wife gets custody of the girls, he looses the house and the minivan, and he is back hanging with his bros again.

I am sure State Farm will be there for the guy (and you) if this happens.  Sadly, this kind of thing does happen.

We can see a series of commercials with this.  Imagine the guy sitting at a bar with his buddies and saying "I am never getting married, again". Then, we see him and his best bro sing You've Lost That Loving Feeling to a girl at the bar.  It starts all over.  Genius!

Maybe we see him with a new wife with step-kids.  Maybe the guy needs to deal with his kids' step father....college for the kids.  I mean, we have something here.  I really hope this is the first of a series by State Farm.

We could go really dark on this, too.  The above is just a 'normal' situation.  What if after "I'm never letting go", it gets all Dateline on everyone. Let your imagination run wild.  The guy goes to strip clubs, driving while intoxicated, embezzles from company, murder, robbery, has illegitimate child, etc. Too dark?

01 April 2016


Hey, it is April Fool's Day.  Only fitting that we start out the month with the ultimate fools...telemarketers.

1 April 2016
  213-814-4571  Los Angeles, CA - Okay, I admit it.  I just got back from holiday and after being trapped in a metal tube for about ten hours at 40,000 feet, I caught some form of virus from some dirty passenger.  I dud a search on this number and no ref flags.  Again, I could be patient zero on this.  Speaking of that, who was patient zero on the plane.  Who knows what kind of virus I have...especially having just been in a foreign country.  So, I am sick and I did not answer the phone.  Not like I was going to anyway...fuck you!

  310-849-7416  Beverly Hills, CA - What?  Two calls in less than an hour!  Must be some kind of April Fool's Day joke.  Fuck you!

Two calls in forty six minutes.
18 April 2016
  313-444-1018  Detroit, MI - Well, that is a huge gap.  It has been over two weeks since our last call.  Hey, wait.  I think this is the first call from Detroit, that is pretty exciting....and, I am over it.  Fuck you!

20 April 2016
  erma.benson@andevenmore.info - Ah, another phishy text message.  They did not even try to come up with a real name here..."Erma Benson"?  I do like the effort in "and even more", but it just screams scam.  Here is the text.

Not much more
So the body of the text is "interested" with a URL.  Interested in what?  Not like I texted "Erma" a picture of my cock, and now she is 'interested'.  Even if I did, I assure you, she would definitely not be interested.

Is she asking if I am interested?  Then, there should be a question mark, as in "hey, are you interested in this fine twat?"  Nope.

But, there is a URL.  Like any one in their right mind would click on this bullshit.  As you can see, I have three unread messages.  I am too lazy to click on those.  The only reason I clicked on this was to get a screen shot and check the rest of the fake email address.

Fuck you!

23 April 2016
  323-358-2900  Montebello, CA - Calls that come in on a Saturday morning are tricky.  They could be legit because one would think that even fucknut telemarketers have the weekend off.  This of course is not the case. Terrorist do not sleep.  Although, I have yet to receive a call in the middle of the night. Well, a lot can change.  Anyway, I have been to Montebello.  It is an okay place to drive by, but it seems it just got shittier thanks to telemarketers.  Fuck you!

 25 April 2016
  323-315-0755  Los Angeles, CA - So, are they turning it on this month in Southern California?  Granted there are not a lot of calls, but a lot of the calls are from the land that does not rain.  Monday calls get me kinda edgy, as I assume this is going to be one of those weeks.  Think about it, I got a call on Saturday morning. What is to stop them from calling me all week?  Well, nothing...not the the Do Not Call Registry...nothing.  So, fuck you!